STEPS TOWARD SELF-LOVE
The discovery of self-love will be the hardest journey, as well as the most rewarding.
photo by Isicle
While we're busy searching for love or comfort in someone else, we start to forget the most important person to love—ourselves.
Practicing self-love can be a challenge considering the ups and downs we experience on a daily basis. I find my hardest times to love myself are my lowest times in life—but I also know that if I find a self-love ritual that is personalized for me, I am able to push through the self-deprecating thoughts.
It's not about being overly-confident or narcissistic, it's about finding the things that truly make you happy and loving yourself whole-heartedly.
Now, there are so many ways that can contribute to our self-hate—social media, magazines, gossip, etc. But do yourself a favor and let go of that cloud of negativity that follows you everywhere. Take a breath, be gentle to your spirit and find you're own self love ritual.
I have put together a few steps toward the journey of self-love. It will be a trial and error process, but be patient—it's about progress, not perfection.
Here are my 10 favorite ways to practice self-love:
1. Positive Talk. Start each morning with an affirmation and a glass of water (and a side of lemons, of course). Nourishing your body AND mind will always be the best kickstart to any day. Write post-it notes with quotes or affirmations and place them on your mirror, car or planner to remind you that positivity always wins the game.
2. End Toxic Relationships. Toxic things, in general, feed off of your bright spirit, don't let others control how you think or feel. Anything or anyone who makes you feel less than special, needs to be kicked to the curb—it's about you now.
3. Find A Creative Outlet. Anything that gets your body or mind moving and thinking can help immensely. Whether it's journaling, drawing or running, just take a moment to do something you love that gives you joy, and that allows you to release stress. For me, writing and dancing are two things that really allow me to explore my creativity, while also giving me the freedom to express myself.
4. Let Go Of Old Wounds. Holding onto the past and revisiting old wounds won't help you move forward—simple as that. Let it go and surround yourself with things that are helping your progress.
5. Forgive Yourself. Everyone makes mistakes, but it's the way you get back up that makes the difference. Be gentle with yourself, life is full of ups and downs and good and bad, don't get discouraged if you slip up or make an error.
6. The Golden Rule. We all know this—"treat others as you want to be treated." If you show respect and gratitude toward someone, it will eventually come back to you. Genuinely complimenting someone or letting someone know you appreciate them will brighten up their day, but also yours. I can't stress how important this is.
7. Learn To Say No. This is the hardest thing in my opinion. If you read my last post, The Recipe of Tolerance, you'll know that people pleasing consumes a lot of us, but it's important to stand your ground and acknowledge yourself, while doing what makes you happy—it's ok to say no.
8. Unique Starts With "U." Beauty is undefined. The things we see on social media or in magazines are photoshopped and are made to question reality. Embrace who You are and what YOU represent, there is no one else like you—you have an advantage, so use it.
9. Create Happiness. The next time you're happy and filled with joy, acknowledge it and write it down. Once you realize things that help you achieve moments of happiness you'll know where to go or what to do in order to get back to that feeling. I love this quote: "Happiness is a mood. It's a condition, it's not a destination. It's like tired or hungry—it's not permanent. It comes and goes and that's ok. And I think if people thought about it that way, they'd find happiness a lot more often."
10. Small Wins Are Big Wins. Progress is better than no progress—two steps forward and one step back is better than no steps at all. Celebrate the moments you step out of your comfort zone or when you block negative thoughts. My grandfather always tells me, "it's not about how far you have to go, it's about how far you've come."
I hope these help you create your own self-love ritual. Our biggest critic is ourself, but don't drown yourself in self-hate. T's easier said than done, but don't determine your worthiness based on other peoples—it's about you and your process. Love yourself with your whole heart, you don't need approval from others, you just need determination to discover self-love.
"You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches.” — Dita Von Teese